I have never drunk blogged before. Truth is, I rarely drink. That is why I figured I should use my first drunk blogging time to tell you that I have absolutely no tolerance.
I am working retail while I go to Library School. One of my closest Chicago friends just left my retail job to work as a bartender at the TGI Fridays in the same complex as my retail job. Today was also my first day as manager (I was just promoted! YAY!) and I was being trained first by my awesome store manager and then I closed with the hated evil assistant manager that I am now on the same level as. The hated evil assistant manager was, as expected, hated and evil. I was stressed and upset when I left work so I walked over to Fridays, sat in front of Jill, and started complaining. She asked if I wanted anything, so I said sure - bring me something fun. I stipulated that she knows that I have no tolerance and so something fun and barely alcoholic. She brought me an electric lemonade which was fantastic! It's lemonade, but blue and alcoholic.
When I was halfway down I was already feeling the alcohol kick in so I demanded of Jill how much alcohol she gave me. "Only five counts of vodka" was the response. "Is that equal to five shots?" I challenged her. "No," she said, "a count is about 1/4 of a shot." "Oh - so only a shot and a quarter?" "Yup"
So I finished it, came home, and am completely schnokered. Is that the proper way to spell schnokered? I don't care.
Anyway - the point of this post is that I am a librarian pirate who gets completely silly off of a shot and a quarter. Over the course of an hour and a quarter.
I'm pathetic, but you all should be grateful that I've caught most of my typos! I hope ...