Sunday, November 12, 2006

flat lpSo I had this whole plan. First I was going to post a celebrity-stalking- style-post about how “I” had figured out what was going on with Librarian Pirate. I was going to post a picture from about a year ago, and then one from now and show that suddenly this mysterious Librarian Pirate HAS BOOBS! The obvious answer is that “she” has had some work done - namely a boob job. I would include an obligatory quote from someone close to Librarian Pirate renouncing this fact, and another from someone else saying that there is a large amount of more boobage - what else could be the culprit?

THEN a few days later I was going to post another celebrity-stalking-style-post denouncing the rumours swirling about a Librarian Pirate boob job and claiming that “we” know the truth. We have discovered photographic evidence that the boobs are not the only thing about “her” that are getting bigger. I would then include a picture of my waist that showed the possibility of a baby bump.

I’m sure you can figure out quite a few reasons why this never happened.

  • It's dumb
  • It's needlessly complicated
  • It is not as funny as I think it is
  • I don't have any good pictures of me with boobs
  • I don't have any good pictures that acurately show off my baby bump
  • I'm not so sure that people would "get it" because of the aforementioned "dumb"ness and needless complication of the scheme
So basically I'm just going to come out and say it. I'm having a baby! I am incredibly excited excited. According to current projections, I get to become a mother and a librarian in the same week! I’m due two days before graduation. Here’s hoping that Turnip Head (working name) isn’t early, because that could really mess up me finishing school the way I want to. We’re rooting for right on time ...

Other questions answered:

No, this probably isn’t going to become a mommy blog. I don’t know that I have spent enough time with my blog for a proper theme to emerge, but I can imagine that me having a baby is just going to add one more topic for me to discuss. An important topic that I will probably spend quite a bit of time talking about, but that will SO very much not be the only thing discussed.

Yes, I’m healthy. Other than throwing up (ALL THE TIME) and general aches and pains (and shortness of breath and random dizziness), I’m just dandy!

Yes, My husband is super happy. Brandon is almost more excited than I am (possibly more, because he isn’t throwing up all the time. I’m super jealous). He does all sorts of adorable things - reading books to my belly, taking good care of his irritable, pregnant wife, etc.

Yes, I am hormonal. I’ve started crying to ranch commercials. FREAKING RANCH COMMERCIALS! It’s a SALAD DRESSING! It isn’t a tear jerker! But have you seen the new Hidden Valley Ranch commercials where the boy or the girl right around my age is in a new apartment/dorm room/whatever that’s drab and full of boxes, and they sit down and eat a salad covered in Hidden Valley Ranch dressing and it transports them to a picnic with their family (presumably in their mind, but if it does have that kind of power, then rock on, Ranch Dressing!) because they miss their family so much? Yeah, makes me cry. The funny thing is, it makes me cry not so much because I miss my family, but because the character in the commercial thinks that salads are the best way to deal with missing their family. Me? I miss my family? I call them. Works SO much better than eating a salad. But then again - that might just be me and my crazy ideas on what to do when you miss your family.

So - any other questions that I missed?

I have to tell you how cute my sister is. Do you remember twelve days ago when she posted about the most adorable bibs ever that she made? And she said that "one of her friends" just announced that she's having a baby? Well ... that friend was me. At first, I thought "friend? FRIEND?" Then I thought, "how sweet! She's not announcing it to the internet before I can!" See - my sister's smarter than I am. I heart her. And those bibs! SO CUTE! I'm not sure if I'm going to let the baby spit up on them ... AND she made us scarves for the crazy cold Chicago winter we've got coming (although it is GORGEOUS today!). Which reminds me - she asked me to take pictures of the scarves so she could preserve them for posterity. Let me go do that ...

Done! Go check out my flickr page if you want to see them (and if you happen to be my sister and would rather I emailed you copies, just say the word, and they're yours!).

Well, it's time for me to go move around the laundry, then clean the kitchen, then eat some chips and salsa while reading a good book. I hope you all enjoy your day!