I'm not slow

So my husband got home while I was on the phone with my sister, and he got on his cell phone almost immediately.

While I had been on the phone with my sister, his best friend had called our land line (ah the modern age of one 2 person family having 3 phone numbers ... ), and had left a message. I went up to him to let him know.

Brandon (into the phone): If you were indeed a mighty raisin, no box could contain you.
Me (half whispering): Thomas called.
Brandon (pointed to the phone to indicate that was, in fact, who he was on the phone with)
Me (turned to leave, pause, registered what he was saying just as I came upon him, and absolutely lost it. We're talking almost floor rolling hysterics [if I was more capable of floor rolling, that is])

No, I'm not slow.

Oh my goodness!!!

My husband is one of the biggest Barenaked Ladies fans there is, so when we saw that they were coming to Chicago again we were ecstatic - then we realized ... on June 18 Turnip Head will be a month and a half old. So no BNL for us.

Today my favorite DJ was giving away tickets to the BNL concert, and on a complete lark I sent a text ... and I won! How awesome is that? So now I have tickets to the concert, but I'll have a one and a half month old that I'm not sure I'll want to leave with a babysitter ...

I'm sure we'll work something out, and if we don't it's not like we had to pay for the tickets ... but for the day I'm going to be excited about the concert and I'll worry about logistics tomorrow.

crazy day - Happy Easter!

This afternoon Brandon and I were rearranging bits of the house when he said, "I had the strangest dream last night. I dreamt that when you were getting up this morning you accidentally poured a jug of water in my ear."

I replied, "it wasn't a jug of water, it was a glass."

He gave me a strange look, "you poured a glass of water in my ear this morning?"

"No. I poured a glass of water all over my face last night." By now I was laughing to hard to continue, so we had to wait for him to find out the whole story. See, last night was particularly bad in the whole "Brandon getting home late from work" thing. There was a party at his restaurant until after closing and then cleaning up after a party takes more time then just regular cleaning up ... and long story short he is climbing into bed after 4:30 in the morning. About an hour later, I was thirsty so I reached to the nightstand and grabbed my glass of water. I held it on my chest as I thought for a second about the best way for me to sit my pregnant self up. THEN I accidentally fell back asleep ... with the glass of water still on my chest. You can guess how I woke up.

So I screamed when I woke up, because a glass of water had just fallen on my face. Brandon (safe and dry way over on his side of the bed) woke up as well and asked me what happened. I said, "I just threw water on my face. Go back to bed." I got up to get a towel and he said, "no you didn't!" Then he moved his head and said, "oh." While I was getting a towel, he rearranged himself so that he was all the way over on MY side of the bed sleeping right on top of the newly created wet spot. I tried to move him but he hadn't been completely awake before and was already far too asleep to notice my efforts.

Somehow his dream state turned that from "my crazy wife threw water on herself and then I had to sleep on wetness" to "my crazy wife poured a jug of water in my ear this morning." Either way, I can't stop giggling when I think of his innocent tale of his dream last night and my dastardly revelation of the truth (The bed was dry by then - I could have denied it all and he'd never know! Curse my commitment to truth, justice, and the American way!).

And with that I bid you a happy easter and a fantastic ... all is ours day.

update: I typed that on the laptop with it in the traditional position on top of my lap. I then sat up a bit to rearrange myself on the couch and my massive pregnant belly started clicking things on the page I was on because I have one of those touchpad mice on this thing.

Made me giggle!

warm gooshy thoughts

About a week ago at work, I walked across the street for lunch to the grocery store because I had a hankering for macaroni and cheese and I know they have a really tasty frozen mac and cheese there. I know, I know - I'm so gourmet. Anyway, they also had there huge bars of chocolate - huge bars of "Regal European Chocolate" on sale for only a dollar! How could any self respecting pregnant lady resist?

Anyway, I went back to work, ate my mac and cheese and opened the chocolate. It was perhaps the worst chocolate I have ever tasted. This really is saying something because I am definitely not a chocolate snob. I love me a Hershey bar - I eat Safeway brand peanut butter cups by the bag full ... so while I do love the rich, extra dark, uber gourmet chocolate, I am not especially picky. This chocolate was just ... really bad.

So anyway, Brandon and my best friend Mia was visiting, and I heard the story of what happened from her. I sent Brandon a text telling him that I had just had some of the worst chocolate ever, and that I was going to bring it home so the two of them could back me up on how bad it is (For the record - Mia agreed with me, I don't think Brandon ever tried it). Brandon paused the video game he and Mia were playing and told her that they had to take a break because they needed to get me something.

So I come home to a bag of My very favoritest chocolate ever (see - I told you I wasn't a chocolate snob!)!, all because my husband loves me! The best part about this chocolate is that you can only get it around Easter, so I don't get over exposed to it and it's always special.

Most of the bag ended up in the freezer, and today - after a half day of throwing up (Thursday) and two days of eating bland blandness (because I still felt really queasy up through dinner last night), I decided to treat myself to one of the eggs. And now I have warm gooshy "I love my sweet sweet husband" thoughts running through my head.

And with that I go to sleep (because as much as I love him, I'm not waiting up for him tonight. It's Saturday night - he's a waiter - he'll be home 'round 3ish - if I'm lucky).

(randomly - while trying to find a link to those great butterfinger eggs, I discovered this. Now I want to try that too! Looks fantastic!)

good morning

My dreams rarely have any bearing on reality and since becoming pregnant that tenuous grasp has completely broken. My dreams no longer have any bearing on the reality that they themselves create. I had a dream awhile ago - the craziest so far - that I had determined not to share here - probably out of embarrassment. I told my sister about it when she came up last week and she immediately told me I should blog that. Whether it's because she wanted to get me back into blogging or because the dream is really as hysterical as I think (and not as embarrassing as I think), here you go!

The dream begins with me in high school, doing high schooly things. I have a huge crush on a guy in the marching band so I ask him out on a date. His response is that instead of going out, how about we get engaged? For some reason, this seems like a brilliant idea to me. Suddenly the dream shifts and I am myself currently. I'm not pregnant, but I am decidedly married to Brandon and very much out of high school. The fiancee has morphed from generic guy in a high school marching band into my female second cousin - B.

This is a conundrum. I do not want to marry my cousin for many reasons. Chief among them is the fact that I am already married to a man I am desperately in love with. Let's not forget the fact that I am not into marrying cousins and the fact that I'm straight.

Everybody's reaction to B. and my engagement is very strange. Brandon is not upset at all - he just wants me to fix it. My family has no problem with my impending bigamy, incest, or discomfort, they just want me to be happy. For my part, I'm just trying to find a way to get out of the engagement without hurting B. The main problem lies in the fact that I love B. because she's my cousin, and I don't want this failed relationship to break our family apart.

Unfortunately I woke up before I could solve the problem because now I'm interested to see how it would have turned out.

...

After all that typing about and thinking about Lacan earlier, I find it harder and harder to return to my paper on disaster preparedness for libraries. Back in college my friends and I used to frequent this adorable tea room in Burlington, VT and we'd act all beatnik and discuss things like Foucault and Lacan and Derrida and pretend we were all sophisticated (or sometimes we'd play zombies [Dead Zombie!] or Chez Geek [justifiable homicide!] and know that we aren't sophisticated at all). I had a friend write a 50 page paper on the Lacanian imagery in the Lord of the Rings movies. That was fun. It's hard to go from thinking about super heady stuff to writing a paper on exactly why a library should have a plan in place for when disaster strikes. How weird is that? The work that has tons of practical applications vs the theoretical work that has little to no bearing on my world right now and which am I interested in? The one that is least helpful to my world right now.

...

We forgot to reset our TV clock for Daylight Savings time, so I haven't seen Lost yet. It will be up at ABC.com tonight, but I'm impatient! I want to know why Lock is in a wheelchair now! But don't tell me if you know ... I'll watch it after class ...

Strange and Wonderful

Do you ever read something so strange and wonderful that you have to share it with the world? I have huge papers to write so of course I am going through back posts of some of my favorite bloggers. I just read Mimi Smartypants revelation:

As I got off the train later some guy was handing out menus for some new Mexican restaurant. I took one because I love reading menus. Then it was like angels were singing and the heavens opened up and the Hand of God came down and started rubbing me in all my happiest private parts, because I realized that the entire Mexican restaurant menu, in order, could be sung to the tune of "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey! NO, SERIOUSLY. IT IS QUITE EERIE. It is like that Emily Dickinson/Gilligan's Island/Yellow Rose of Texas thing. For instance, take that "streetlight people, living just to find emotion" line and substitute "chicken flautas, beef and cheese chimichanga" and you will have just a tiny taste of the magic that I found.

I had to go find Don't Stop Believing on YouTube so I could get a proper idea of what she was saying, and it was brilliant! I now have Mexican food songs stuck in my head ... which reminds me: my husband made Mole (or is it molé?) a few days ago and I could be eating it right now (That boy makes the best mole ... ), so I am going to go take a break while I get myself some.

...

I have recently realized that laconic means (basically) terse. I had always assumed that people were referring to something as being reminiscent of Jacques Lacan's philosophies. I remember spending ages in multiple classes (both Critical Theory and Compromising Positions) in college discussing Lacanian Imagery, and I assumed that laconic was just people misspelling his name and misinterpreting his theory (because it isn't often that you can refer to something as both terse and as having a complex relationship between gender-related imagery and vocalization(1)). I realized my mistake just now when I was researching disaster preparedness plans for libraries and somehow got to reading a page where the raven from Poe's "The Raven" was described as laconic. Obviously the raven has not been silenced, and as I recall it is heavily implied that the raven is male (although I remember nothing specific and I definitely remember no phallic objects connecting themselves to "him"), but the word seeemed even more out of context than usual ... and it was being used by an author I tend to respect, so I looked it up and Voila! Instant vocabulary lesson. How had I missed this one?

1) Yes, I know that is the worst ever explanation of Lacanian Imagery ever. You try explaining it in half a sentence! The basics: phallic imagery, vaginal imagery, woman being silenced (and vaginal imagery implying that someone cannot speak for themselves), etc.

...

I have a doctor's appointment to go to. Have a fantastic day! And look: somewhat regular updates and LABELS! I'm workin' it!

Super Bowl Sunday!

With me being in Chicago, the Super Bowl is HUGE this year. I was just checking out TVGuide.com to see what time the official game starts, and I discovered something interesting on Animal Planet. To quote The TV Guide listings for Puppy Bowl III, "Puppies cavort in a play area that looks like a football stadium in the third annual event that offers an alternative to the Super Bowl. Included: a halftime show featuring kittens."

Part of me is terrified, and part of me wishes I had a blank tape so I could record this for future use. What exactly that future use is, I am unsure ... but it would be decidedly fantastic.

So a ton has happened since I last updated. Our computer is officially running Windows Vista now! We had been using the Beta version for awhile, but now we've upgraded to the full thing. I'm having fun exploring, but the husband really knows his stuff and could tell you about all the wonderful fantastic things Vista can do!

Speaking of which - I had texted him about the fantasticness of Puppy Bowl, and he told me where to find the CD that will reinstall the software that lets us record TV straight onto the computer! YAY! Puppy Bowl III - you will be mine! I'm going to go do that, and then later write a whole new entry all about the rest of my life. There's big news! Hint: I'm a librarian!!!!!

Advice Requested

I am in the middle of a bit of a job flux. I graduate in May with my MLS, which is super exciting (YAY!), and I am already keeping an eye out for library related jobs. I am applying for a storytelling internship at the library down the street (literally six blocks away. How wonderful would that be? And I'd be STORYTELLING!) which would be only 10 hours a week but otherwise perfect: working with youth, getting to know people at the library I would ideally want to work with when I graduate, and best of all - it ends just before my due date so I can easily take time off to have a baby!

I just got an email from one of my professors. A library way out in the suburbs is hiring a youth librarian, and they are willing to look at people who are almost done with their MLS (that's ME!). I'm definately going to apply because what is the harm in applying? There are a couple of cons for this job, the main one being that map quest says it's 45 minutes away - but I used to have a class way out their and with the construction on the Dan Ryan it's more like an hour and a half ... PLUS I'm having a baby in May. How great is it to say, "wow, this job is wonderful! Thank you! I'm gonna need a couple of weeks off in about four months. Is that ok?" Pros for the job? It's in youth services, it's part time (I was planning on taking a few months off after giving birth, but a part time job that works with my schedule would be fantastic as well), and it's in a pretty nice suburb.

Ok, so I guess I don't really need advice - I'm going to apply for it either way. I'm doubting I'll get it because it's the type of job that everyone at my school will probably apply for ... but a girl can hope, yes?

I hate writing cover letters. As soon as I am done here I am going to the library and getting a few books on writing cover letters. They always seem so awkward and formal and contrived to me, no matter what I write. Anyone out there really fantastic at cover letters who wants to give me some pointers? I'd be appreciative.

P.S. I've been reading like crazy and plan on telling y'all about them very shortly. Stay tuned for reading fun!

Barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen ...

I am feeling all domestic and kitchy and 1940s. Back during the summer, Jell-O was on sale and I thought, "who doesn't love Jell-O?" So I bought eight packages. How much Jell-O have I made since I bought them? Exactly none ... and I have had the craziest craving for Jell-O lately. I think it is brought on by the commercials they have nowadays for the people who eat the wiggly desert and start wiggling themselves. They're strangely addicting commercials. ANYWAY - I looked in my pantry and realized that three of the flavors I have - Strawberry, Apricot, and Pineapple - look very pleasing together, so I just made up three batches and am letting them cool for a bit before I pour them one on top of each other. I've never done this before, and the web is not being helpful when it comes to telling me how long to chill before mixing ... four hours total for chilling - that I know - so I've set the timer for an hour (by then they should be reasonably firm, I think), but I'm checking it in half an hour.

The ultimate goal? Red, orange, and yellow kitchy goodness!

I just realized something

I am very envious of my sister. My favorite animal in the whole wide world is the mhorr or Dama Gazelle. I love it - but it is extinct outside of captivity, so I have never actually seen one. My sister used to live in St. Louis and one of her favorite places to go there was the zoo ...

and this means that she has seen mhorrs quite a bit!

So now I have to get ahold of her and ask if they are as gorgeous in person as they are in pictures.

(edited because I am a silly Librarian Pirate)

Hmm - Blogger does not seem to be letting me update right now. I’m not sure if this has anything to do with the scheduled outage tomorrow morning or if this is just because I’m special, but either way I can’t do it! The blogger page is glitching all over the place. I’m writing this on Monday, January 8 at 3:38 pm, but perhaps it won’t be updated until Blogger feels like letting me tomorrow ...

I made eggnog cheesecake a few days ago for my husband’s birthday. I just asked him if he was ok with dinner tonight being cheesecake and milkshakes, and he said yes. WOO! Go me! I don’t know why, but it’s always more fun to have crazy dinners when I can pretend that “it’s ok. I have permission.” The permission could have come from my 12 year old cousin and that would be just fine with me, as long as I have it. This seems to me to be the opposite of what most people would want. For many, the pleasure of the deviant dinner comes specifically from the fact that dinner should not be cheesecake and milkshakes. For me, the pleasure comes from the dinner being something I shouldn’t be supposed to do - but it’s ok, because I’m special. It’s an ego boost.

Now that was a completely boring rambly paragraph that could easily be summed up as, “cheesecake and milkshakes for dinner! Woo! You do it too, I give you permission.”

Ice Cream is buy one get one free at the store right now (because really, who buys ice cream on January 8th? Me! That’s who!), so I get to spend the whole day deciding on milk shake flavors. Brandon said he doesn’t care, so it’s all up to me. I’m thinking chocolate and mint chocolate chip ... although I know Brandon has a thing for banana milk shakes (don’t ask me. Eeeew), so perhaps mint chocolate chip and banana ... or perhaps I’ll just decide when I get there.

For Christmas, Brandon got me a DVD set of movies by the Monty Python boys. Last night and this morning we watched The Adventures of Baron Munchausen which contained my new motto. Someone tells Baron Munchausen that he has no grasp of reality and he responds, "Your reality, sir, is lies and balderdash and I am delighted to say I have no grasp of it whatsoever." Overall it was a fantastic movie - one of Uma Thurman's first (one of the few times where I think she is really as gorgeous as everyone says she is is this movie), and Sarah Polley (who I loved in Road to Avonlea when I was little).

Anyway, I'm back from work and Blogger is letting me post so I better not miss this opportunity!

A hint of Philosophy at work

As most people who have worked retail for far too long, I have some standard phrases I use in certain situations. When I see a customer who looks as though they are in need of some help I walk up and ask "How can I help you today?" If I see a customer who looks as though they are finding and enjoying and probably not (but perhaps) in need if anything I ask, "Are you finding everything alright today?" Today I walked up to a customer and asked her "Are you finding yourself alright today?"

Existentialism when shopping for picture frames. Can't beat that!

In other news, I burned my hand pretty badly last night. I tried to take a picture of the gruesome blaring grossness that is my hand, but I couldn't quite get the flash to stop washing out the burn and making it look pale and wimpy (compared to the red grossness that it is), but at least you can kinda see the size of the burn. It hurts like crazy, but my loving husband bought me pirate bandages!!! Seriously - how cool is that? It would be even better if they were librarian bandages ...

Anyway! I'm off to eat carrots. I've got a crazy craving ...

Love in the library quiet and cool!

So - one of my New Year's resolutions? Update at least once a week. We'll see how it goes. We all know I'm a slacker monkey, so this might be a problem ...

Penny Arcade pointed me in the direction of the video for Everytime We Touch by Cascada (Joan?). Parts of it I like - turning the library into a dance party? Awesome. The funky dancing janitor? Groovy! The library they filmed the song in is awesomely old fashioned which makes me grin and giggle like a schoolgirl. The song itself is too Pop-y for my usual tastes, but it's somehow infectious ...

My main problem with the video? It isn't the stereotypical shushing librarians ... it's the desperate need for Miss Cascada to rearrange the library's card catalog
and then throw random cards around. How is anyone going to find their books NOW, eh? Yes, the library should have that all on computer by now (it is 2007), but they've probably invested their money elsewhere - like in keeping the library groovy and old style looking!

Ok, so I'm a huge geek ... isn't that why you love me?

In other news - first ultrasound! My baby officially has fingers and toes! YAY!